Problem solving

Problems - how to spot them and how to solve them

Problems are all around us, we come across them every day. As you are reading this you might be thinking about a problem you are trying to sort out right now.

Even though it may seem obvious, problem solving is something we do all the time. It’s what we do to deal with all types of issues, hassles and decisions that we face every day.

There are two main types of problems that we face in our lives. These are conflicts between ourselves and other people and the everyday problems we face like deciding which clothes to wear or working out what we’re going to do on the weekend. Along with this goes fixing things that are broken and changing things for the better. All these involve problem solving.

Problem Solving

We start problem solving when we are little kids in situations like sharing toys. As we grow up our problem solving skills grow along the way from watching other people like our parents and from the experiences we have. These experiences aren’t always enjoyable and we might not have solved every problem we have had, but they all affect our problem solving skills.

Problem solving involves

• Knowing when we are faced with a problem
  
• Identifying what the problem is and how we feel about it
  
• Thinking of different ways to solve the problem
  
• Having a go at solving the problem with one of the options or solutions we’ve come up with
  
• Seeing if it worked out or if we have to keep trying other ways to solve the problem
  

Planning ahead to prevent problems is also problem solving.

Breaking down what problem solving involves shows us that as much can go into dealing with simple problems as it does major ones.

Conflict

As young people, we face many different problems during this time in our life and we seem to come across more conflicts between us and others. Conflicts can be about having different points of view, different ideas and not agreeing with something that is said or being done to you or others.

The problem solving that we use to resolve fights and arguments without resorting to violence and abuse is known as conflict resolution. Conflicts can occur between parents, girl/boy friends, friends etc.

People usually solve problems or conflicts by either cracking up at the other person and using anger to try to get their own way OR by sticking their head in the sand, ignoring their own feelings and hoping the problem will go away. These don’t solve anything and usually end up making the problems worse or creating new problems that you have to deal with.

What is the best way to solve these problems?

Well, the first thing to consider would be to talk to the person or people you’re having a problem with! This is not easy to do when you are feeling really angry or hurt so you have to calm yourself down first. Also you have to be willing to listen to what they have to say. It’s a two sided thing and you might have to remind the person or people you’re having a conflict with that this is the case.

It’s much better to get things out into the open and discuss them rather than letting them sit inside you. Better still, you might be able to come up with a solution that works for everyone involved.

Don’t ignore problems

It is really important to try to solve your problems and if you have heaps to deal with then look at each problem one at a time. Some things just can’t be solved overnight. You will need more time to solve huge problems and for these types of problems you may need to get help from others. There’s no point ignoring problems, they will only hang around longer and can even get worse.

You can solve your problems

In many cases you will find that by just taking a walk or sitting down by yourself a solution will come to you. Frequently stress is what prevents a problem being solved. Physical exercise and relaxing (taking time out) are two great ways to de-stress.

There are some problems which even after trying you might not be able to solve. These problems could be serious and out of control and it is best to talk to someone you trust like parents, friends, or a teacher and get them out into the open.

If you feel like you can’t talk or are not ready to talk to anyone, then there are other things you can do. You could express the feelings you are having by writing them down as poetry or a song – anything that gets it out of your system. Finding books about your problem or going to the Internet are good places to get information to help you work out what is involved and some ways to deal with them.

Most of the time you will be able to solve your own problems and when you do, you feel happier, in control and enjoy positive mental health. So get rid of those problems that are hassling you now!

There is more information in the topic Handling conflict

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